Out of Range

It's funny how something so little can quickly bring you back. I am in a great mood this morning. As I was leaving the house I flipped open my old binder of CDs and grabbed one at random. I'm not even sure what made me do this - for those of you who don't know me, my CD collection is HORRIBLE. My car was broken into a few times during college, and all my CDs stolen each time. I gave up on replacing them. And now with my emusic.com subscription, I don't need CDs.

I ended up grabbing one that used to be a favorite of mine. Used to be. A long time ago. Back when I was different. I've been thinking for a long time how different I am now. I mean, I still look the way I did when I was five. But there are some things about me that are just really different, even from just 3 years ago. It may be hard for anyone else to notice, but I notice, all the time. And so often I forget how I used to be, as if "she" is one of those sadly lost college friends or something. But, in an instant, this CD gave me a glimpse of who I was...and it was nice. I remembered about a thousand different times when I listened to each song, memories that shouldn't be so difficult to conjure up. I almost didn't want to get out of the car!

"somebody do something, anything soon. I know I can't be the only whatever I am in the room. so why am I so lonely? why am I so tired? I need company. I need backup. I need to be inspired."